Anyone out there like to fix what’s broken? Solve problems? Get sh…tuff done?
Anyone out there have years of feedback where you did just that and were recognized, rewarded, and promoted because of it?
You’re not alone. And as is the case for many who rise through the ranks, “doing” is no longer the only game you get to play. You have to lead, guide, manage, support, direct, clarify, influence. You have to do this with messy, imperfect humans, including ones who aren’t just like you.
Recently, coaching one of my clients, let’s call him John, we were exploring this in the context of his personal default to fix anything his coworkers put in front of him. A brilliant fixer, John was stumped as to why so many of these situations ended up sideways. I asked him what might be obvious to many but was mystifying for John: what if they didn’t always reach out for you to solve their problem? His (literal) response? Why the f--- would they bring it to me if they didn’t want me to fix it?!
Perhaps they simply wanted a nudge in the right direction, and you fixing it effectively stole their ability to solve the problem. Or, maybe they just needed to have a sounding board to listen to them as they externally processed the problem and figured it out themselves.
After acknowledging this new awareness, John paused and in an equally passionate manner, raised his hands in frustration, replying how the hell am I supposed to know if they want me to fix something or not?!
Pause.
“Ask them.”
Pause.
“How about asking: do you want an ear, hand or hint?”
Breakthrough! Immediately, John lit up, rhetorically asking, it can’t be that easy, can it? Over the following weeks, he led with this question. Sure enough, sometimes his coworkers wanted to talk through a problem but not have John solve it, offering them an ear. Sometimes they approached him as the experienced person he is in his field, wanting a breadcrumb …a hint. And sometimes but certainly not always, they wanted John to save the day, roll up his sleeves and get his hands dirty to solve the problem.
John confirmed for himself that it was, in fact, that easy. He also noticed numerous other benefits: his stress level dropped, his interactions were healthier, and he and his team actually got more work done. Continued over time, I’d expect there would be greater trust and deeper relationships as well, with John shifting from bulldozing solver towards enabler of his coworkers’ success.
So to all the fixers out there, I’d like to acknowledge you for all the many problems you’ve solved. Getting things done has absolutely contributed to getting you where you are today. But what got you here may not itself get you where you want to be. You’re a leader now, so ask the question and take things on, one ear, hand, or hint at a time.
Comments